freeride..

this... this... i wish.. i..

the past 18 years

well.. the past 18 years of my life ain;t very interesting.. things just got better when i came here in 2006. Back in the ulu town of sungai petani, nth happens.. birthdays are spent with aunties and uncles and neighbors(oh gosh i sound like a dork). anyways, it;s not that they aren't special. but they're just yeah.. the same every year..with the exception of my parents.. but this year was different.. i would like to dedicate a very special thank you to all the VICKERIANS and MEWIANS??(canning mews people) who, even on the eve of doom( the WAUFP), have made this 30th of October one of the most memorable nights in my life.. the cake.. the laughter.. and poor ol' jun gettin bullied by beaten(literally) by everyone else.. lolz.. was fun to see(...no offense jun...). hehe...ty ty ty..

and especially Jasper. this guy.. i tell u.. this guy.. huh.. ask me so direct about my birthday present i still dunno..so sneaky man.. he got me a custom hand made bicycle helmet.. hehe.. knowing i love bikes.. to think that he would actually personally make an ambigram of my name.. stick and spray and .. it's just wow.. first time receive something like this lor..cannot stand.. lolz.. ty ty ty ty



pictures and all will come later.. lolz
didnt take from them yet.. hehe

tytytytytyty

parents..

i am so thankful to have such wonderfull parents.. my dad called me today to ask my results and to check up on things.. and yea.. bout the results.. told him i only passed two out of my 5 subjects and guess what he says?.. he says the thing he always says with that tone that has a hint of disappointment and tells me that there will be the next one to come. and he did this for every exam that comes along.. and i just keep failing and failing and failing.. i can imagine how disappointed he is to see the results that comes through the mail each time. i feel like i do not deserve any of love i receive from my family..the only thing i return to them are fails.. i wish i could just go back in time and change myself.. maybe then i wouldn't be the dumbest goh around.. sighs.. i dont wanna disappoint anymore.

.........

What do i do when all hope is lost?
Do i still try to fool myself into believing that there is still a chance?
Do i hang on when i should just let go of this lost cause?

i just wanna walk out that door
go somewhere, do something,
Nothing seems worth it anymore,
all hope is gone,

i mean.. all whom i love and adore
what will they see after the sad end?
who will i be after the very end?

...

first tag in my life

Seven things to be done before my death:
1. Ensure my ticket into heaven.. ^^
2. Meet the girl of my dreams.
3. Make my parents proud by graduating UNI.
4. write songs!! for my friends and loved ones
5. Have a few nice cars in a nice cozy house(nice not meaning big)
6. Going cycling in one of the most beautiful mountains on earth
7. Live a happy meaningful life b4 i leave this world with no regrets

Seven things that i will not do even if it kills me:
1. commit suicide... lolz.. erm..
2. Eating anything that isn't dead
3. Do drugs or any things from that category(smoking etc.)
4. Hit women
5. Pierce any part of my body
6. Get a tattoo
7. kiss a man.. like.. "kiss".. oh no never.. >.<

Seven things I do when I'm away from the public:
1. "Gold" digging(nose)
2. Walk around half naked..
3. Run around half naked.( oh it;s just a horrible scene )
4. Play the guitar without my fingers shivering
5. Wear female clothing.. er..
6. Think and Imagine the past and future and how i wish i could change them
7. truly relax..and let go of my seroundings

Seven fav sentences/quotes:
1. Super geng to the max .. please
2. What the??
3. I'm sorry i tried
4. Fuyoh!!!
5. Wahlieweh
6. Sien man!!
7. dude...

Seven favourite songs from all time:
1. Antonella's birthday- tommy emmanuel
2. If you get there before i do - collin raye
3. Classical gas- many people play this song.. eric clapton/ tommy emmanuel
4. Hosanna - Hillsongs
5. Wu ding - jay chou feat landy wen( i dont even know what this song means.. but it sounds nice)
6. Santana feat. chad kroeger - into the night
7. many many others..

Seven things I'll make you wish you didn't do if you did:
1. Betrayed by a good friend
2. Being the boss of my life
3. Ignore me
4. Left me hanging when i needed someone
5. Good friends stealing from me
6. Being used and manipulated
7. Break my heart

Seven people to tag:
1. Pawleen @ http://silenceisloud.blogspot.com
2. Che che @ http://lavender-girl.blogspot.com/
3. Annabelle @ http://annachuu.blogspot.com/
4. Anna @ http://anna-lim.blogspot.com/
5. leonel @ http://leonelcheong.blogspot.com/
6. sadly i dont know anyone else with a blog that i can tag

The End of the Old and the Begining of a New.... HAIR!!

Wahaha... EXAMS OUT!!!!.. haha.. the last paper is today.. but then we have another one after 2 or 3 weeks.. wahaha.. it doesn;t matter. it's the end of the semester 2 exams and it;s holiday time.. haha.. and we're going to rodness.. and i;m going mtbing again tomorrow.. wahaha.. happy happy happy.. and to top it up.. i got me a new hair.. haha..

(yes i know i need to work on the face and the size.. lolz.. but the hair's a start..)

HAHA.. RATE.. 1-10 when leaving comment

...From the side...

...From the back...
...From the front...

2 down 3 to go!!!

done calc today.. haha.... 2 down 3 to go!!!.. so lookin forward to the end of exams.. beach and biking and rodness!!! here i come.. but first..

zzzzzz... exams... zzzz..

friends

who are my friends? They are the people who are there whenever i feel lonely, sad or depressed. They are people who are there when i'm happy, high(i mean like high with sugar kind of high). and i dont have too many of them. sadly.. Most of the people i know i just "know". hmm.. makes me think how i should have applied for vickory house when i came here. That place just seems so happening, with lots of love and fun going around.

i was in homestay for a year staying with almost 10 different people in that period of time. Then, this year i moved out to live with my sister. which is the only i see every time i come back from school.

it's really hard for me to find people i can talk to. well.. cause i am not a very exiting person to talk to. I just freeze up every time a topic in a conversation ends. Guess that don't make me an interesting person to be with either. it's when browse through my phonebook when i'm sad and wont know who to call at the end of the list..

in my one and a half years at canning college. there are only few people that i feel i can really call my "friends"..so... thank you to all those who are my friends or would consider me as your friend. to all vickerians, canning college people and zion people, you will be cherished. especially Jasper, who has truly been there when i'm laughing and when i'm blue.. special thanks to you for what u have done for me.. they will never be forgotten..

people come and go, but friendships, they stay eternal.. to me..

motivation... come!!

Half of the holidays have gone. And what have i achieved?.. half a page of my applicable notes *sighs*.. i just feel so demotivated.. i just feel so in the holiday mood. and the exams have to just be in our holidays .. and after that is the foundation exams.. what to do??. argh.. what to do??... huhu... i just wanna ... i just want.. grr... *collapses*

The walls in our lives

this song,walls , was written by Tommy Emanuel with his fiancee Elizabeth Watkins

it really tells of the chains of pride, fear, that we sometimes put on ourselves to tie us down, and how we should break free in order to achieve our dreams, our desires,...love..

walls - Tommy Emanuel

Some walls are made of stone
Some walls we build our own
Some walls stand for years
Some wash away with tears

some walls are line with gold where
some hearts stay safe and cold
some walls are made of doubt
holding in and keeping out

if there's any hope for love at all
some walls must fall

some walls are built on pride
some keep the child inside
some walls are built in fear that
love let go will disappear

if there's any hope for love at all
some walls must fall

how will you ever know what might be found
until you let the walls come tumbling down

if there's any hope for love at all
some walls must fall

PARTAE!!!....

haha.. sowy it took so long to post this.. keke.. last day of school!!.. and it was ELACS.. the best subject to celebrate the end of term 3 with.. wo hoo!.. went out with a bang.. lol.. it was the bom man.. songs.. games.. photos.. okok.. now let these photos do the talking..

ELACS class.. Jan Vines... one of the best elacs teachers out there

me and Pawleen.. kawai..

me and me good buddy jas jas(camwhore)..

paw paw on the guitar.. she played hero-enrique ingleseas(jasper sang)lol
super geng..

..people started pouring in when the music started to play..

jun and khang wee clappin to da music

me and jan.. did i mention she was the best ELACS teacher?.. keke..

another 3 leng luis.. keke.. yii zhu, pauline, kar wei.. lol..

3 leng luis..(juwina, yi xiu, yi zhu)

here's yi xiu and frankie.. lol.. ahem ahem..